"Peru is built for little people, and North Americans by default are waaayyy too big to ever possibly travel comfortably here."

Howdy kidz

Well, time to write another whole lot about another whole week. Last week I ran outta time before I got to finish. Oops! Let's get started...

This week was interesting. On Wednesday morning we had a special conference in Chiclayo where missionaries in areas with a long history of having problems with their ward or branch were invited. So of course we went! Haha. And Pacasmayo was there as well. Lolz. But anyway it was early Wednesday morning, so we had two options: One, wake up way too early on Wednesday to take the almost two hour trip to Chiclayo, or two, stay in Lambayeque Tuesday night so that Wednesday morning we can sleep and only have to travel like 20 minutes. We picked option two. However, it caused some serious problems. For my health. First of all, Tuesday morning was our district and zone meeting in Lambayeque. About an hour and twenty minute drive one way. Traveling here in Peru sucks. It is just the absolute worst. Peru is built for little people, and North Americans by default are waaayyy too big to ever possibly travel comfortably here. So, just going to our district meetings once a week is torture enough for me. I'm just crammed in the van with less than no leg room and sometimes not even room for my head. So on Tuesday we traveled like that to Lambayeque in the morning, traveled again like that to come back to Olmos for our appointments, and then a third time later that night to stay the night in Lambayeque. Oh gosh oh gosh I wanted to die so bad! I think I am permanently damaging my body every time I travel in Peru. The conference was pretty rad though. Well, it wasn't so much the conference itself. It was more of the fact that Elder Choc was there and it was so so so good to see him again! We talked a ton and I got to sit by him during the conference and it was the best ever. I miss that guy a heck of a ton. And then after the conference Elder Villatoro had an interview with President Risso, so I got to wait outside with Hermana Risso and I was talking to her about the MTC in Provo and how awesome it was and how apparently its even way radder for mission presidents because they got to spend basically an entire week surrounded by the Apostles and First Presidency. No fair! But still, I gotta see Russell M. Nelson at least. That was way up there on my list of life highlights. And we talked about temples and stuff and it’s so not fair that we can't go to the temple here! Hermana Risso is the best ever though. And so is President Risso. After the conference, since we were the last elders there, President Risso offered us a ride in his car to the Olmos carport, which was so sick because it was the first time in over nine months that I've been inside a comfortable car!! It reminded me of home. Best ten minute drive of my life.

Aside from that, I gotta say, this week has not been the most eventful week of my mission. Lots of working, little success. I must have walked ten thousand billion kadrillion glumagillion miles this week tracting and not entering houses. I seriously got sooo worn out one day because we were basically just walking all day long because every one of our appointments fell through and we just could not get into any houses. My legs were just killing me so bad, and all I wanted was for us to be able to teach a lesson, mostly just because I wanted to sit down. Then that night, at like 6:00-ish, we knock this door, and talk to this lady for a while, and she invites us in. Finally!!!!! We walk inside only to discover that the family is just barely moving in, and there are no chairs. We taught the lesson standing up. Are. You. Kidding me?!?!?!?! Haha. The worst. Good lesson though, leg pains aside. Just for an idea of what it’s like working here: every single appointment we've had since Wednesday has fallen through. Every single one. Soooo lame.

On Friday we had an activity here with the branch in Motupe that was geared towards new converts. It was... not that great. But we didn't organize it, so not our fault! But the elders from Motupe were there with us and our ZLs also came down, and we did a skit of the conversion of Saul of Tarsus. It was kinda silly. I, along with Elder Espinoza, got to play the part of a horse. It was so close to living my dream of wearing a two person horse costume!!! Except we only used a sheet. But still. Close! Also there was this kid there who read my nametag and asked me what my second last name was. He would not believe me when I told him that I only have one last name. "Why don't you want to tell me?" he asked me, "The elder over there told me his...". I don't have another last name!!!

On Sunday in elders quorum I made the suggestion that everyone should have a copy of the missionary handbook, because it has all the priesthood ordinances 'n stuff in it. The quorum got stoked on the idea and now they're gonna order missionary handbooks for every priesthood holder in the branch. Kewl. My one good deed of the week. Haha.

I really don't have a lot to say about this week. Its been rough. Olmos is a tough area. But I do like it and I'd rather stay here than get transferred. I think mostly because of how awesome Hermana Rosa and her family are. Haha. They're like my family away from home. They're the best ever!!

Other random events of interest from this past week might include that I saw the most awesomest shooting star I've ever seen. You could totally see the trail of fire behind it and everything until it disintegrated into nothing. Pretty neat dood. Also, for the first time since I've been in Peru, this one girl actually covered up as she started breastfeeding her baby in front of us. For the first time!! That was nice of her. People in Peru are like Adam and Eve, "And they were... naked, and were not ashamed." Today when we went to pick up our laundry from the lady who cleans our clothes, she was watching Spongebob, and I saw like two minutes of it and it was hilarious. But the voices are super lame in Spanish. And the other day we saw someone was watching the SyFy channel and a movie was on of a two headed shark. Haha. I miss watching SyFy with my roommates. Sharktopus is the best, and at the same time the worst movie ever. Sharktopus!!

For some reason I really really badly miss Christmas right now. I need Christmas!!

And also I need to go. I'll try to have something cooler to talk about next week. Thanks for loving me.

-Elder Hemsley